7 Common Trade-offs in Life

To get something you want, you have to give up something else you want. In other words, it can be said as trade-offs!Life is full of possibilities, can we have it all?! Hmm.. sadly there is often a cost of something incurred for what you give up to get it. So, have you thought of trade-offs you often face in life? Enrolling into society and workplace, the increment of chances to face trade-offs become greater.

In my opinion, there are few common trade-offs that we face in life:

No.1 Working holidays abroad/ Advanced education vs Job experiences

I had been thought of this for several times during days and nights after my degree studies completed. Shall I pursue for a Masters degree now? Or should I work for few years then pursue further studies? Could I have both together at the same time? Could I manage it if I study Masters part-time after working? Would my company allows me to go off on-time?

If my decision is to have advanced degree now, I might lose one to two years of working experience and of course the earnings too. But if I choose not to have Masters degree, my qualification will be lower from time to time. There are millions degree graduates out there right now every year.

Okay, come to the working holiday abroad which is getting more popular in Malaysia. Many of the seniors went to U.S.A, New Zealand and Australia to have working holiday abroad. The benefits are widened view and opportunities to explore the world when young and (single and available) apart from personal satisfaction, but there are costs besides “out of pocket” costs like further education and N years' lost earnings. Furthermore, will the employer kindly keep your job position available till you are back from working holiday abroad? Hmm..

No.2  Career advancement vs More time to spent with family

We couldn't have all the advantages of having more time to spent with our loved ones especially family. If
the working hours are 8 approximately, to be competitive in workplace, we might need to work overtime  to get things done and yea, more time for our career. There would be a trade-off occurs in achieving career
advancement by sacrificing time to spent with family or even ourselves. You can't be a leader and be free of responsibility. How can a leader often go back home earlier than his followers? We want a work-life balance, but how many employers are really practicing this for their workers?

 No.3  Extra income vs Rest days

Recently, most of my friends had discussed me with this topic. First and foremost, occupation had become one of the topics. Will you sacrifice to become a doctor/auditor/banker if your wealth (health) is taxed? But all these occupations gain respects from others and the occupation itself was often named as professional jobs. Apart from the higher income, benefits of these employment are better than the others. Yet your working hours will be longer compared to most other occupations which may have lower salaries.

The next thing I would say is the basic income is not enough for fresh graduate nowadays. Okay, probably the money left (after deducting EPF and SOSCO deduction, car petrol and maintenance, support family and meals ) would be sufficient for us to survive only. We can work overtime or have part time job to earn extra income, but we would lose our rest days. A busy weekend to gain extra income or utilize the weekend to replenish your sleep? That's your choice.

No.4  Get married/ paired up or being single

Can I have both advantages of single life and be married? Being paired up would have the advantage of someone will be there to care about you when you are sad, happy or angry or disappointed; financially supported by one another; an all-the-time listener and etc. However, you need to give up freedom and time for yourself. You need to tolerate, accept, spend time and money on the one you love. There are many other trade-offs in a relationship or a marriage after all. So, get married or being single (forever alone) ? The opportunity cost is often incurred in which what you give up in order to obtain the item in question.

 No.5  Buying branded stuffs or cheaper but low quality stuffs

Nah.. you can't be thrifty if you love to buy branded stuffs. In contrast, you can't expect for good quality stuffs which are sold at lower price. This causes me stayed in perpetual state of frustration and disappointment during most of my shopping time. Spending RM 70-RM100 on a quality and nice dress or keep the money to purchase 2-3 nice outfits? Another trade-off I have thought of : Buying an imported car or national car.. Cars depreciate value from time to time, but purchasing a national car doesn't give me a sense of security due to bad feedback from my friends regarding their cars' engines quality and the material which seems not durable. However, an imported car's price could be higher than a national car for several thousand bucks. Huh..

No.6  Invest or save money for rainy days

In this contemporary, the property prices keep increasing and most of the older ones mentioned that now is the best time to invest on property. However, invest the house to standby awaiting for next generation to grow up and live there? Or the money is much more better to be saved for rainy days? At this moment, we have to be rational to think at the margin.

*Choosing the level of action where the marginal benefit equals the marginal cost.

No.7  Eat all-you-like vs Control, control and control you weight and appetite 

Do you have a great appetite and feel like eating when you see nice food images shared at social networking sites?Delicious foods are over tempting and irresistible.
Again, there is a trade-off between gaining weight and never miss a chance to food-testing. In the end, it is always an solution for eating all-you-like without controlling appetite and weight i.e walk extra miles after meals or do exercise.

My second thought: Will you give up nice foods (desserts, burgers, pizzas,snacks, fast foods, caffeine drinks) for your health? All these high calories food might cause high blood pressure,obesity and other health issues. But all these foods look so yummy!

Nevertheless, there are many trade-offs in our life, yet we should feel grateful for the paths we have chosen. At least, we are still given opportunities to make decision for any trade-off. Let's set free from the paralysis of "never enough" and move forward to "good enough."

Facebook pictures

It's a boring night when I have to spend the night doing some reviews on Facebook vs. MySpace. Well, Facebook is like butter or bread for me ever since Facebook Connect is utilized by most websites I used to log on and even everything regards to class cancellation, class replacement or tips on exam are spread through Facebook. So, I definitely LOVE Facebook! haha..

Well, recently there are various pictures circulating around Facebook which have made me laughed, agreed upon or....

Isn't he looks cute and adorable?

He said, " Is time to keep fit, right?"
(p/s: wish my future son will not fat like this though..)

Well said, how many of us can accept each other's weakness / differences?

This reminded me of Mr. Sunny Lim who talked on this during the English tuition.Yea, it's true.. Men know nothing about girls.. Believe it not? hehe.. let's look at the picture below:

So, any guys understand women's language especially when they are in love with you..?

{p/s 1: only apply when the girl is truly loves you}

{p/s 2: some guys might get over-reacted when see this picture by pinpointing why women can't speak their heart out using words. Well, my suggestion is use your heart to feel what she wants/needs. Don't you feel tired if the one you love understand your needs/wants only if everything also said by words?}

A person shared this message to me, isn't this true? =) hehe.. SWEET~~

People always think that when you sleep together, there’s always something thatis happening in between the sheets and the bed. But let me tell you, It’s not always like that. The feeling of actually hugging each other until you fall asleep, the warmth of each other’s breath, and the total happiness in the morning when you wake up right beside them. Everything may sound so good to be true, but sometimes it takes a lot of responsibility and love to be able to be as wholesome as possible. Sleeping with your special someone is one of the most heartwarming experiences you’ll ever have. No nothing, simply hugging and smiling yourself to sleep.

Okay, the end of this short blog post.. Gotta complete my assignment by tonight~ Huh..

The Kübler-Ross Model

The busy week had been finally ended after completing the tons of assignments. Today, my housemates and I had been going to two famous temples in Batu Pahat in order to soothe our minds. This would be a hard semester for me to go through but I believe that I can progress further if I hold tight on the belief. Everything happens for a reason.. Hmm, the reason, i shall let the time to prove it or perhaps there's never have an answer for that. Anyway, I got the fortune tally which shows me better future ahead, and I hope it will truly happen to me =)

Life is just as fragile as the heart. R.I.P hui en's friend. Sometimes, we often dwell over the past and could not fill the depression with joys, and eventually end our life. During the sad moments, what we need the most are someone who can give us positive comforts and advices, or just a pair of ears to listen to us. I would say that friends and family play important roles as they are the ones who will be there as listeners and supporters when you feeling so down as if the world is ending.

Hereby, I would like to share an article that I read at noon i.e. 'The Kübler-Ross Model', which is commonly known as the The Five Stages Of Grief. I found that most of us will experience the stages below depressively when undergo some significant events.

The 5 stages, popularly known in its abbreviated form DABDA, include:

1. Denial — "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening, not to me."
   Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally replaced with heightened awareness of positions and individuals that will be left behind after death.
2. Anger — "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me?"; '"Who is to blame?"
   Once in the second stage, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Because of anger, the person is very difficult to care for due to misplaced feelings of rage and envy. Any individual that symbolizes life or energy is subject to projected resentment and jealousy.
3. Bargaining — "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything for a few more years."; "I will give my life savings if..."
   The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the individual is saying, "I understand I will die, but if I could just have more time..."
4. Depression — "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die... What's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"
   During the fourth stage, the dying person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. This process allows the dying person to disconnect from things of love and affection. It is not recommended to attempt to cheer up an individual who is in this stage. It is an important time for grieving that must be processed.
5. Acceptance — "It's going to be okay."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."
   In this last stage, the individual begins to come to terms with his mortality or that of his loved one.

Okay, I seems like still being around the stage of denial, anger and bargaining. Huh! Bad progress, but I wish for the day that I will say " I am fine" and I truly mean what i spoken that time.

You can’t change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying about the future.

“Never allow anyone to rain on your parade and thus cast a pall of gloom and defeat on the entire day. Remember that no talent, no self-denial, no brains, no character, are required to set up in the fault-finding business. Nothing external can have any power over you unless you permit it. Your time is too precious to be sacrificed in wasted days combating the menial forces of hate, jealously, and envy. Guard your fragile life carefully. Only God can shape a flower, but any foolish child can pull it to pieces.”

~ Og Mandino quotes Check out this book at Amazon.com:

mixture~

Today, we had an interview for our hubungan etnik assignment regarding hokkien with a superb woman. She doesn't look like someone who is having sickness from the way she talked, and she is open-minded to share with us about her experience, opinions about life, family, love and even relationship. My friends and I are very agreed with one of the sentences she said in which," 婚姻最后的不是爱情，而是一种责任、依赖、感情和习惯。" It means a relationship/ marriage is not composed of love after all, it is left with responsibility, dependency, feeling and customary. Seriously, I hope that the one I am going to be together for the whole life is someone who can share his happiness and sadness with me (sharing thoughts), communicate with me whenever problem arises, comfort me or hold me tight when I am in need of his supports. Somehow, what she said is really meaningful, the moment you are with this person, you are sure that you love her/him, but could you be sure that you will still love her/him next month, next year or 1 year after or....?!

She had shared with us about how she communicate with her sons who were sent to singapore to study. For me, her educational method is differed from my mom who stresses about my studies and I don't be allowed to hang out or watch tv during exam periods while she lets her children to have their own ways to study and give pressures when in need. uh... I feel amazed by her sons who can be so independent of their parents. This is the quote found from her fb info, giving me and my gang some thoughts again...=)

最觉得被爱的，
不是他吻你或云雨缠绵时，
而是他轻轻伸出手，
把你的手紧握在掌中，
珍而重之！
用心握过你手之人，
即使无缘，
他心里必定爱过你！

我爱你,不光因为你的样子，还因为，和你在一起时，我的样子。 我爱你，不光因为你为我而做的事，还因为，为了你，我能做成的事。 我爱你，因为你能唤出，我最真的那部分。 我爱你，因为你穿越我心灵的旷野，如同阳光穿透水晶般容易。 ——[爱尔兰]罗伊·克里夫特

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The magnitude-8.9 offshore quake struck at 2:46 p.m. local time and was the biggest to hit Japan since record-keeping began in the late 1800s. It ranked as the fifth-largest earthquake in the world since 1900 and was nearly 8,000 times stronger than one that devastated Christchurch, New Zealand, last month, scientists said.

‎* 现在全东京电话都不能用，只有网络。所有人这时候都在走路回家，电车瘫痪。日本人只担心没食物。店长还很敬业的开店，怕大家没食物吃。只有超市关门，货物都倒了，无法营业。

*几百人在广场避震完毕，整个过程，无一人抽烟。服务员在跑，拿来一切毯子，热水，饼干。所有男人帮助女人，跑回大楼为女人拿东西 ，接来电线放收音机。几个小时后，人散，地上没有一片垃圾。

* 地震後，日本三得利公司宣布所有販售機將免費供應飲料！日本的711和全家全部免费提供食品和饮水！渴了，自动贩卖机免费；饿了，便利店免费；累了，大超市开放避难；寂寞了，公众电话免费；听不懂日语，电视台中文喊话教怎么避难。這就是國家形象，日本雖然受災，日本人卻給世人上了一課。
.........
* 一日本网友说：说句心里话，虽然我在日本，但其实庆幸是发生在日本，不然死伤人数肯定很恐怖，我相信全世界只有日本才可以把死伤降到最低！

这就是亚洲强国的力量！

The attitudes of how Japanese lending out their helping hands to each other after the devastation of the earthquake disaster should be learnt by all of us. The spirits, the kind-heartness, disciplines embedded in them shall be learnt by us when we face any disaster in time. When we questioned that how could their country's people have the ability to do so even they face the disaster, we often get the answer i.e." their education is better, their technology is more sophisticated,they had experienced all these disasters and they have predicted this might happen, their president are more charismatic, their country is at top rank of development"... I would say that all these answers are just excuses! Well, not to mention the country's name, experiencing various times of flood, I don't see the government have done any better approaches in handling all these. Moreover, this is just a small natural disaster compared to earthquakes, tsunami, eruption of volcanoes and etc. Huh..i opine that a developing (developed) country is not having a nice palace, huge and tall buildings, but have the appropriate approaches to aid its people whenever disaster come.

Anyway, truly bless and pray for Japan and hopefully the quake will not affect other countries which lie on "the ring of fire".

p/s: When you hear about the happening of this disaster, who is the one who appear in your mind? Do appreciate the people that you love! Life may just gone within seconds ...

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Had been exhausted because of loads of assignments to rush with,tests preparations, interviews, Sife thingy, and on 11/3/2011-my health's alarm has been shown up red alert... Cough+ Flu + fever...=( I hope my body could be recovered before next Tuesday.. Gonna prepare for test~

p/s: thanks to chia pei who cooked porridge for me as I lost my taste buds during sick..Indeed, I felt the warmth of the sisterly friendship. Honestly, I felt touched!

I know miracles don't happen, but I'm still waiting to see if you'll make an effort.

Bad day

Last Thursday~

It was a terrible day that I had gone through where something bad had happened to me unexpectedly. It's my own mistake for carrying two luggages with a backpack on my back when go back to KL. I did not sleep well on the previous night as something had happened and indeed it ruined my mood. Huh...

It was around 5pm which was the rush hour in KL.The train was crowded when it arrived at the station of Bandar Tasik Selatan. I felt my right body being pushed into the train but I thought that it was normal since many people disembarked while the people standing behind me were just rushing into the train. I was managed to enter the train and standing near the door. After putting down my luggages on the floor whilst the door of ktm closed, I tucked my hand inside my right pocket of my jeans and found that the phone wasn't there. I quickly reach for it in my left pocket yet it wasn't there too. I began to feel frightened and quickly searched for my handset in luggages and backpack. It's gone! I asked the people who standing around me if they ever see anyone taking something out from my pocket. The feeling of losing handset was very terrible and I felt so hopeless! Huh..I realized that I had been pickpocketed when the people disembarked out from the train that moment. I had been asking people around to lend me handset to call my parents and sister yet I was very unlucky to have them not picking the phone. I had the Hobson's Choice to call him to contact my sister since I am using other's handphone for few moments. I felt so ashamed of myself for encounter accident again when I reached KL. I was even being advised by some passengers for being extra be careful when taking KTM.

Huh...luckily my mom was contacted finally and she reached to fetch me. I burst into crying when met her,knowing that it's the second time I met accident when came back from Johor. Naturally, I was being scolded by mom for not being careful and bringing two luggages on hand. Shall I felt relieved that I am still alive and my purse was not gone? I had to pay RM15 for the sim card to be replaced. When I recalled back, the lost handset was almost out of battery thus the credits were not being used. Yet, my heart is still bleeding ever since I lost the phone as many memorable messages had been kept inside the handset and now, they are forever gone. I also regretted that I didn't copy the phone numbers and therefore it became a great problem for me later on to try to contact the persons whose names were kept in the phone. Sighed...Am I looked very blur, easy to be cheated or pickpocketed?But I do know that it was my mistake too for not being careful in the crowded area. Sighed! Minutes before being pickpocketed, I even had used my handset to try contacting my home! Argh!!!

I really hate the society in KL. nowadays..The main factor for all the social skulduggery in KL. or any big cities is that the country has recruited too many foreigners especially Negroid. Look, I am not having discriminative attitude towards them but the recruitment of foreigners in malaysia is seemed to be out of control nowadays. Our country cannot track the lost mobile phone like some other countries out there.. Haiz.. can't our government or authorities enhance themselves and take draconian measures towards the social decadence?!

I miss my Nokia 6120...I couldn't buy it from marketplace anymore...=( I felt so regretted for not backup my phonebook and certain messages~ I felt awfully upset because parents took this accident openly and dad even got me a handset yesterday. It's a lesson to be learnt and I really have to be cautious when going anywhere from now onwards.

Nevertheless, I really appreciated the help given by the KL.central guy, the uncle and the malay auntie who had lent me to use their handsets to contact people for help...

I miss the days I used to have smooth paths to move on safely..

I miss the days I used to be cheerful and brave...

I miss the days I don't put up fake smiles..Huh...seriously, when the bad days will leave me?

The batterfield of life

The general life cycle of everyone starts from fetus,toddler, kid/child, teenager, adult,senior citizen and death~The above picture had illustrated how's our life cycle would be, and what we do during the life cycle.

Yesterday, something bad had happened which made me realizing the importance to love and appreciate our ownselves as well as the one you loved i.e. family, friends, and the only one.There are so many cases like fetus died in the womb,unwanted accidents,health diseases which may cause death and etc.

How many people can undergo the whole life cycle then kick the bucket when eventually old? How many people fail to open their eyes after a long sleep?
How many people could predict how long he/she would be living?
How many people can know what will be happened in the next seconds after present!?


The quote goes,"Life is not measured by the number of breath we take, but the moments that take our breaths away." The young woman's death had made me realized how short is our lives used to be, and how often we keep looking backwards and grieve over the past for which it's gone. Hmm..I used to be troubled about the future, how's my future life would become; for which it's not yet come. ( I love planning about my life though). It's more realistic if we appreciate our present lives and put our hearts,soul and efforts to make it worth remembering!



~人生很短暂,学会知足、爱惜自己、珍惜身边你爱的或关心你的每一个人~

I LOVE My Family,
Especially Dad And Mom,
Of Course The Darling Sisters And The Rebellious Brother,

And For The Very Reason,

It 's Because We Are A Family Which Cannot Destroy Kindred,

Our Chains Stretch A Little Sometimes, But They Never Break.

~Nothing’s gonna change my love for you~

I May ❤Him,

If His Passion Of Love Strike A Consensus Between Us,

If His Compassion And Trust Touch The Inner Heart Wall,

And For Any Other Reasons,

I Would Hold Him Tight When I Could,

Embracing Happiness And Sorrows Together,

~Love Story~

I HEART My True Friends,

I Might Have A Garden,

But Only The Holly-trees ( True Friendships) Bloom Constantly,

~As Long As You Love Me~